ELI

Lydia, With the cold sweeping in, I was lonely but not bitter / You came within a light that had shown through the darkest liquor. At first was with shared laughs and venting to one another / Then it had grown deeper and deeper, you couldn't see one without the other / Next, We started chilling more and more, sharing emotions with the notion Of the idea We have each other no matter the storms or how deep the ocean. Watching cartoons, creating drinking games; photo shoots for all of your followers / Becoming more than friends with happiness like we were at a bridal shower. Than a day so dark, indeed, had crept upon Our doorstep / Creating a fog so steep, with grief, now We're sitting in front of  death. Things were said, feelings were hurt and now We dare to step Into the abyss again /   with loving tears; as me for you straight jacket. Overcome this, We shall, with hard work and diligence / The patience of a monk to assist Us...

I write my life in these scripts.   Like screen shots, save the pics, so you can remember me when I'm gone.   Been putting my everything in every poem since 6.   23 now and still sticking to the script.   They tell me "give it up, chase another dream." But writing is my passion, it's addicting if you ask me. Life's been so unlucky, seen some friends laid in caskets, immortalized on T-Shirts. A hater can't see that we hurt? I got no choice but write it out, These pains are deep, it's hard to take in, Let alone man, being able to sleep.   The night Emmitt died I felt revenge starting to creep.   I was leaving from work, I got the call, and I   -   Could barely even drive the car, tears was swelling my eyes; My homie said, "he fighting for his life."   I thought he would've made it out that same night.   The next morning checked my phone, was on facebook, "Rest in Peace Dub." Everywhere;   ...

I promise to write to you.   Every Thursday .   And I keep my promises under lock and key,   So you know my word is safe.   Every since that one Monday that I saw you but never got to mention that I love you, I love you to hell and back and then some.   And then some more; I'll be the guy that lights candles and throws rose petals on the floor. The guy that you can call, will have my pedal to the floor, if things get salty I'll be there to add some sugar to the moments.   I remember when I seen you walking down the street with your head down, you was at your lowest;   And then we talked and then that made you happy.   A perfect stranger at the moment, not knowing what this would come to.   And that was Wednesday , before you left I told you, every Thursday look for letters.   And you know I keep my promises under lock and key,   And the locksmiths me; And I'm hiding the extra one inside of ...

I can't get no rest, no sleep.   All I want in this world is peace.   They don't know why it hurts so deep.   Cops killing blacks; One day it could be me.   I got a family.   I got a family. My mother, my brothers, my sisters, my Grammy.   My father, my auntie; They want me to keep it together.   But I just can't keep it together.   All I want is sleep.   All I want is peace.   All they need is help, I woke up thinking that could be me.   Who are we supposed to be trusting ?   Jesus is who I put all my trust in.   Without him I know I would be nothing.   They want me to keep it together.   But I can not keep together.   Because,   I can't get no rest, no sleep.   All I want in this world is peace.   They don't know why it hurts so deep.   Blacks killing blacks; One day it could be me.   Dang,  

Take me back to the 90’s - where we cared less, but loved more. here, we’re glorified for our past - where we went out and played Real Games, OUTSIDE. before the time flew by, before the new millennium crept in while we were sleeping; altering the basis of what tender, love, and care really was. We grew up with very little household rules. because we understood the consequences that would ensue had we not followed the ones that were already in place. society had rules. and still do, to this day. we grew up embellished in love - no matter the race, no matter straight, or gay. we grew up knowing, never to judge. TV actually taught us things. cartoons where we’d learn math, or English in the songs we sang. late nights risking it all because we were supposed to be in be, but “All That” came on and all that mattered was that we watch the latest episode. We didn’t have twitter. We didn’t have facebook, who was mark? Myspace wasn’t even ...

I can't get a solid sleep man.   I I I i I get shaky.   The more I think about all we've lost.   What if I'm next? What if it's my brother? My sister? My mother? The stress is deep like that.   I'm not even in the street, like that.   When cops get behind me I won't   even stop; Unless I'm in a well lit area, with plenty of witnesses, Even then man.   The stress is deep like that.   I can't get a solid sleep.   I've tried my hands at counting sheep. I even got so far as to tuck my buzzlightyear stuffed Animal in before me just so he can protect me, "infinitely, and beyond." I'm 23.   Yes, I'm 23. Yes, I have a buzz light year stuffed animal.   I also have woody. He's a stand up guy.   I never left them like Andy did, when I went to school I let them ride ... I - I have an emotional detachment disorder , I think.   Because I can't leave their side - and I can't connect with an actual human bein...

Death to anything that tries to cover up real beauty.  you are. I am. We are, all human. With flaws, aches, and ailments. Ain't nobody perfect. Except the one that made us, and made it all worth it. You're not worthless. Who You told you that, told you lies. They're not God, so how can they tell you how to live your life. You're not perfect. But you try. And that's all you can do. Because the one that is perfect, doesn't have to try, he's perfecting your life; Starting from inside. So don't cry. No, don't cry, dry your eyes. And don't listen to the people, Putting negativity inside your mind...

She contemplating life like "who's really good for me?"   She stay down on her knees so much, they bruised homie;   And she don't know her worth.   She sexing almost anything with a shirt.   No protection, she just lift up on her a skirt and let him go to work.   And when he get off, he gon be the first, and then he out the door, leaving her alone with an unsettled score... Unsatisfied,   Tears fill her lonely eyes.   The poster-child for simple,     tonight she feels unorganized.   Contemplating life like "how should i really feel inside?"   Can't really trust a man with answers, because they only wanna fill inside.   They only wanna fill inside...

Story of my life. I've been down, and I've been out. But I never been a coward. I've showed this world what I'm about. Twenty three years on me. Got my plans mapped out so clear. My momma said, "you can make it happen." It starts with God. Just pray; he's always near. Guilty of being me. Something I've  held close. True to form, True to life, true to art. True to God, whom I love the most. whom I love the most, because who am I, Without the one who gave me breathe? Grateful, Grateful. If my life stopped here, I'm ready for what's next. A grateful poet. Under pressure, & I know it. To be one of the greatest. To outmatch my favorites. To be a name on somebody's playlist. To be a name on the A list. To be the word in people's mouth. To be the name throughout their house. A household name. What a plan it seems. What a plan I have made, out of Gods calling for me.  Im Just Grateful for l...

Bullets don't carry names.   Tragedy striking, I'm going insane.   Every single day another twenty something headlines the front page.   Some that I know, some that I don't, but it's all the same.   The world needs change... But we speak on that on the off.   Like, just in case this happens again let's make "black lives matter."   But that's never to the black lives that take ours.   You're taking your own... They're taking their own.   Brothers killing brothers because his shoes the freshest.   Sisters beating sisters in high schools restrooms.   Over dudes... Is we bored? Or is we restless?   We just reckless. What make a man kill a man?   Like DVX say.   Off that liquor and that weed will make you do some crazy things.   I mean ,   It Make you do some Brazy things. My momma told me never say where i sleep.   Just keep that under the sheets.   And never drag your busines...

  i know that something is wrong here, i can feel it but no one believes me.  i know that something is strange here, i can sense it but no one believes me. We face changes everyday.  Some good, some for the worse.  Faces change everyday,  Don't know who's really with you until the hearse.  The news say, one thousand one hundred and thirty four black men die every year.  By gun shots, from weak cops that live to see black moms in tears.  And love to see the black community in fear.  But we don't fear.  We rise up.  It's reasons like this why some of my people got a 9 tucked.  Because we're fearing for our lives; Can't even walk outside or drive. We just wanna be free.... • • •  Free your mind.  Release the binds and unwind.  Break out of that mental prison;  Take the time to make the right decisions.  What do you want out of life...

Heavy is the heart that cries tears.   Of sorrow.   Heavy is the heart that's scared.   Of tomorrow .   Because it doesn't know exactly what to expect.   Heavy is the heart; Shown no respect.   I turned the news on this morning.   As if it were a surprise, another mother in mourning.   Black, mother to be exact.   Crying on TV, because she can never get her baby back.   Heavy is the heart that feels sympathy for that mother.   Heavy is the heart that's scared to comfort another.   Because it doesn't know exactly what to say in situations like these.   Heavy is the heart,   The heart of me.... -Ep

  Calculating all the loss.   Why they keep on killing us?   They don't even know what for... piecing my thoughts together. .. How can I piece my thoughts together?   When the word "peace" ain't even in my thoughts forever.   I'm just being honest.   Makes you wanna riot.   If black lives really matter;   Then why would we stay quiet?   It's an uphill battle we're steady climbing.   Respect and recognition.   Respect and recognition.   If my black skin was any indication,   I won't be forgotten. I won't be forgetting; Calculating all the loss. .. Why they keep killing us?   They don't even know what for... They don't even know.   No.   What you wanna erase us off the face of the planet? Just be honest Mr. Officer.   Them my brothers, why you hassle them?   Why you after them?   What's the crime they committed? Being committed to seeing dreams come true isn...

I Saw you at your worst and still thought you were the best. I was interested your mind. And they just wanted sex. You picked me apart for my bad habits. Like you wasn't human either, you ain't have flaws. Now my momma asking "where did that girl go?" "The one you used to call, why you don't call no mo'?" I was tripping. She was tripping momma. It's 2016 they want it different momma. Usually after the sex they go missing momma. And leave me hanging. I can get with it momma. Even if I'm single all my life. Guess I'm single all my life then. Much rather spend time by myself. Than with somebody who never wanted to be my wife then.. I'm Tryna build really. I'm 23 now you gotta keep it real with me. Where's the empathy, love, why don't you feel for me? I am not these dudes. Not into the games that they're into. But if you're in too; We probably had a good run. We probably had a good run. ...

  Alton Sterling,  Another one.  So disturbing,  Another one.  6:24   in the morning before the sun is up.  I watch the video three times and seen no fault where he coming from.  He never fought, they was holding him.  They tried say he had a gun on him, If he did have a gun on him,   How could he use it, when your knee was on top of him? We seen the footage, Ain't no escaping this one officer.  They looking to extinguish the black man,  I'm in anguish.  My brain so heavy, my pain so heavy.  Can't even trust my own city cops,  What a bad rep they've gotten.  All over the nation,  We've witnessed many cops being rotten.  And I don't wanna be a cop no mo'.  Scared for my safety, cause even I see a cop and wanna bust shots, on spot, Oh no!  He was just selling CDs.  Like the swap meet, but these boys was threatened by a bla...

Spending a year in your basement, and rarely coming out,  teaches you a lot about people.  The ones that say they got your back, but you get jammed up and can’t find them.  The ones that spend forever phone talking to you; And giving you superb advice on why to come down from the ledge.  And the ones who actually visit daily just to  make sure you're still good.  My brother told me what God already explained: All suffering is valid.  And just because I'm not dying doesn't mean I don't get to complain.  How I complain more about my life being stagnant? Than the boy with cancer complains about his life being short.  And that's okay because pain rarely follows rules.  I never even learned his name.  But he told me something I hold ever so closely: On those days when I wish I'd never woken up, I'm allowed to scream and ask why it's happening to good people like myself.  But I mus...

White folks pushing all of our buttons... They shoot a black man, leave him there gasping for air. I can't breathe. Don't get me started. you  got me riled up. Was gonna wish somebody send a few shots through those 2 cops that sent 6 through Alton; But that would prove faultless. World is too heartless. Most specifically, Most of these pigs in uniform be Cold blooded. my brother taught me. So we don't trust them, as sad as it seems. Well, what's sad is who gave them their keys. Who gave them a glock? We don't flock to the scene, just to hear them make excuses, We  search for justice and peace. For peace... For peace... For peace... But it always seems so far. I shouldn't be afraid every time I'm in my car. I shouldn't look around every where and feel uncomfortable. But I do, and it's a shame what the nation has become. ••• ••• ••• Momma crying tears. She don't want her son walking the streets by himself. That...

Lone ship, lord. Lone ship; Please take the bow. I can't wait any longer, lord. I need. You now. I often feel myself drifting. Sometimes cutting it too close. I don't want to end up missing, Out on what I love the most. Somethings I hold in. Some feelings i can't show. But these things, to you, no surprise. Because all things you do know. I need you now. I need you now. A lone ship in this vast ocean. I need you now. Lord, please take the bow. -Gp

                                                                             Birthday in July. Just wanna see if you remember that. "Close friends" haven't even called me back. Guess we kind of veered off of the "friends" path. What is loyalty nowadays anyway? 2016, man "friends" come and go... But I never thought it'd be you. In high school we were a crew. Post-grad, you in college, I found my own way. And I ain't seen a text from you or heard my phone ring. I guess you're just doing your own thing. maybe we wasn't friends and I was more like a charity case in high school, got me like a stowaway. Is what I'm saying here true? Answer my calls, I wanna talk to you - all. All four of us, we ...