ELI

[i never let stuff from personal journals go. but, i wanted to share this.a short rant-style poem from me to God.... no title, despite the pictures' saying...] Lord, We need you now more than ever. I need you now... Too many people are dying, too many have died. And I know that was the best thing for them, to go with you but still many of those people lord - they were young, they were my friends, it was too early for them to leave us.  People are shooting. They shoot at any and everything and everyone. Cops are killing cops are killing blacks and whites and everybody. We don't even know who Heros are anymore. We can't recognize who's here to help for real or who's just another target spotter looking to knock a couple heads off. We need you.  Lord, I need you. Although I haven't prayed as of late (I don't know what excuse to tell you for that, there is none) I need you. I need you to come live inside of my heart. You're the only one th...

Got some things I gotta tell you...  You remind me of an angel, girl you're hell proof. I just peep all that you've been through; you the strongest woman ever - next to my mother - girl I'm glad I found you.... Lately i ain't really get no time - to write, but you was always all up on my mind - all night. Taking up space, girl you had me occupied, and I love it, I'm just praying I can be your next guy - if you wanna... We can lay up, we can watch Netflix and just cuddle. I done formulated plans, felt like I was in a huddle; Im just tryna put a ring on it fast like a shuttle. Your old boyfriend - bad news, he really need a muzzle - all he ever wanna do is beef with me and all my others. You should tell him back up off us, baby.  I ain't with the violence.  I came a grown man since I left the hood for college. New set of rules, change for the better, now all I need is you - now & forever. For the better .... ••••••• What you bored of? ...

Are you still around? Hello, Hello.  Cause I haven't heard from you in so long. We were gonna be perfect, I could feel it. It was worth it. I prayed about it. But you played about it. I forgave you. Are you still around? Hello... Hello.  You never answer your phone. Is this the same number? Or did you get it changed? You promised me you'd never stray; Away, No. So, Are you still around? Or did you up and leave me? Do you watch the TV? Cops out here acting like black people don't matter. And I just need someone to talk to. Because I'm scared to go out in my own city. These boys, these boys; They don't care who you are. They don't fist fight no more, if you don't agree with em, then that problem there is solved one way; One way. It's like I'm going down a one way street - to some place, I just don't get it. They could be coming for me next. That's why I go...